Regretful Decisions

Have you ever feel regretful for the decisions you have made? It is not pleasant is it? Regret is an emotion, a feeling of sadness or disappointment because you were unable to do something or because you did something you wished it had not occurred. I am sure many people have experienced this feeling but to what extent? Regret is formed by your decisions. Whether your decisions are right or wrong, it is decided by you. I have refused to think about an incident that happened 3 years ago until now. It was not pretty. I have been pushing this question away from me ever since. However, I feel that it has gone long enough and I have reflected on my decisions.

A basic form of regret is when you make a wrong decision at that moment in time. I am sure every school going children or teenagers can relate to this. One very common cause for regret is.....Yes, making the wrong decision during the test. When you are stuck at a question, you have to make a smart guess, the one with the most probability of scoring the mark However, things may not go as you thought and you may lose that mark. A few more mistakes and you drop a grade or even fail. When you look back on your mistakes, you will ask yourself, “Why did you write this”. You feel regretful because you felt you could have done better. This is a minor regret as it does affect you much unless of course you fail and things happen to you but that is not very common.

My regret was formed about 3 years ago when I was 11.I was in the table tennis school team. I was a team player since 8 and I was quite good at the game. My school was well-known for its table tennis school team and was the top 4 in the national competition every year. I was one of the main 7 players. I played in the tournament, won and lost, but that is not important. I was proud that I was a member of the team and I represented the school for one of its most popular and best sports. My parents were proud and I was proud of myself.

Then, it happened during the second half of the year. I did nothing wrong but I was humiliated. (I was not scolded)I specify I did nothing wrong. There was internal conflict.I was sad, my parents were angry. My parents pulled me out of the team immediately with my consent. I never played that game for that year. Never again I played the game competitively.

After pulling out of the team, many of my ex-team members asked why I quit. I gave those indirect answers or wrong ones. I was not prepared to tell them the real one. I was still shaken by the incident. No one was sure why I actually quit because there were underlying causes I will not tell.

I have reflected on this incident but I am still unsure whether I should have left the team. There is something that is better left uncertain. I was happy playing the game and I was proud of myself. One thing for sure, I regret that I have give up on this skill. I have learnt that skill for more than 6 years and it is a pity to give up on the sport. I have lost my pride for the game and for myself. Though I picked up a new sport, I cannot help feeling that I did not get the same feeling as when I played table tennis.6 years or training, 6 years of fun was washed away by just one decision. Whether right or wrong, I do not think it is right for me to decide now. Perhaps a few more years later, when I have grown older and matured, I may have a clearer view of the incident.

I have learnt that decisions shape our life. One decision made me give up a sport and learn a new one. Decisions are the ones that open up new routes for us. Wrong ones can cost us while right decision will help us. When we decide on something, we need to take a view from a third party as the first person point of view is rarely correct. I was only able to see from my point of view during that incident and it could have been a mistake. Perhaps maturing helps in decision making in situations. With a mature and clear mind, we can make the right decisions for ourselves and others. Decisions are the ones that affect our future. The most importantly, you must not regret your own decisions

Choose wisely so you will not regret