Why I twirl my pen?

Hmm, my friend had asked this question recently and I am not too sure why. In school, during class, assembly or any other activities, I am usually seen twirling my pen. My friends had always raised their eyebrows at this mystery on why I bring my pens everywhere. I have heard that they sometimes speculate on the reason for my actions and joke about it. I am not too clear about the reason but I will explore it through this blog post.

My pen twirling is quite different from the others. The conventional ones are those who twirl their pen in one hand. They use only one pen. Though I too know how to do that way, I have come out with my other ways to play with pens. You know at the end of every pen,, there is usually a plastic clip or paper holder or something like that. I join multiple pens together, twisting and rolling it on my side of the finger. I have made one “design" that consists of 4 pens, anymore and it would be dumb. I made another one with a pen and a highlighter. You know the highlighter has a cap. If you clip the pen onto the cap of the highlighter and loosen the cap on the highlighter, you can create a spinning pen toy. It is actually quite fun.

On to why I bring a pen along everywhere is because I do not want to miss out on anything. A pen in the pocket will come in handy in taking down notes or write short little reminders to you. A paper without a pen is useless as the most important thing it to take down notes. When the teacher wants you to take down something important or anything that we need to take note and I do not have a pen, I would feel....frustrated.

Another reason for that is to, well, twirl my pen. I am fascinated at how the pen spins or twirl till spinning the pen becomes a habit. Since it is a habit, I soon invent or create new ways of playing with pens as the others will become boring. This helps me especially when I am trying to get through a very boring class or it could help me to de-stress. My friend says I am a very physics person since I am intrigue by motion. Whatever the reason, to me spinning a pen is fun. This is how you find joy.

There are some things you do them not because there is a proper reason. You just do it because it is a habit or mainly for fun. Twirling my pen makes me happy and feel relax so I do not try to question why I do it. There are always little things in life that makes you happy so let them put a smile on your face.
No matter how insignificant or silly it may be, if some little thing makes you happy, do it.

P.S :Inspired by Martin Chen
http://i-suppose-you-blog-at.blogspot.com

Messy room

One hectic week of test had passed and I finally have time to blog. I will be posting up 2 posts over the long weekend, sharing with you what had happened to me this week such as being a tour guide of a China exchange program. Today, I will share with you my very frantic Sunday night in finding a piece of paper.

You may be thinking "What? A piece of paper" and yes I stayed up to midnight trying to find that piece.

I was never a neat person. Perhaps it is my personality or laziness to clean my room or keep it in tip top shape. I have piles of paper on my study table which my mum had requested me to clear in the June holidays. I did but the pile soon grew back to size. The tidiness of my room would drastically decrease when the period of tests arrived. Paper would be on the floor, study table and even on my bed. I do not have a big room so I do not have much space for the ever increasing amount of notes the teachers would give. I am one of those people who do not file their work until the teachers request for the files. You can see this from my over sized personal file which I lug everywhere. You can tell my untidiness from my handwriting. My friend had frequently commented that my handwriting was uniquely illegible. Although I try to do the best I can in everything, tidiness is just not one of them.

Now you know the real me...for those who did not know my untidy room.

As I was saying, it happened on a Sunday night. I was mugging, studying very hard for the Geography test the next day my room was in a mess. Papers were everywhere. My bed was messed up, the table was covered with a mass of geography notes, homework, the laptop and other books. This was very common in the test period though I tidy most of my room when I went to sleep.

I was very focussed on Geography when my mum came in. She placed the OBS medical form and other forms on the table near me. Earlier in the day, I went for a medical check up to certify I was fit to participate in the end-of-year camp. I went to the doctor to get a very simple medical check up including height and weight which cost an expensive 27 dollar consultation fee when you consider the effort the doctor had put in. The OBS medical form had to be passed up on the next day too.( When I realized I need a medical check-up, I guessed many people had forgotten about it too)Since I was engrossed in studying, I simple put the forms on the messy table near the laptop. This was a mistake on my part.

Sigh... soon it was bedtime. I decided to sleep early at around 10.45pm. When I was packing my stuff, I realized my OBS medical form was gone. It had disappeared with the wind. Maybe others will say I am overreacting but I would prefer to do things perfect on the day of a test. Getting scolded by some chance would definitely affect my mood for the test. So I started on a frantic journey through my geography notes. Since I was studying geography, there was a possibility that I got stuck between pieces of notes. However, I checked them more than 5 times to no avail. I looked at the table where my mum supposedly put the forms but after clearing the desk, I could not find the OBS medical form. I had easily found the other two forms but the most important one was missing. Then, I looked around my bed. I looked under, on, beside and below my blanket but it was futile. I looked in my personal file but it was no there too. Searching the ground, I found a highlighter and a pencil but no OBS form. I had practically ransacked my room before I had called for help (mum). She started to search my room too. She said she had placed it near me on the drawer table. She searched my bad, file floor, table and practically everywhere. It was nowhere to be found.

Therefore, I went to the living room to search for it. Looking under the sofa, tables and below the TV, I found nothing. I even looked in the refrigerator in case I left it over there when I grabbed a bite. I was thinking perhaps a ghost did not want me to go for the camp. Or perhaps the wind blew it away. I was at my wits end. My mum was saying "How can it be? I put it in your room! How can it just disappear like that" Other than having the risk of being scolding if you did not have the form, you had to go to the doctor's clinic again and pay another fee. Also, due to my packed schedule, I could only go there again during the next weekend. It would waste time, money and effort.

Then my sister entered my room to return the laptop she was using. I was searching in the toilet then. She said "Hey Jon, I dropped a piece of paper when I took the notebook" The she took a piece of paper for the top shelf of a cupboard which I had never thought it would be at. Yes, it was the OBS form. But what was it doing over there? My sister said she thought it dropped from the cupboard so she put it back on the top shelf which was obviously much taller than me.

........

I would have never guessed it. I never put things over there know I would never do it so I never search for it there. The paper was out of view since it was so high up.

I gave her a blank look. My mum hit her on the back asking why she never helped us earlier. My sister said she never thought about it until then.-_-. Then it was a mix sense of joy and anger but i rolled on the floor laughing because while all the time I was looking, my sister was the one who caused it and she only took a second to find it. I did not know what to feel. My sister cheekily went back to her room while I quickly packed my bag and went to sleep, waiting for the next day. It was past 12. How I wish you knew my pain. I did not stay up late to study but rather to find a piece of paper with a signature on it. I had wasted much of my precious sleeping time

I learnt something from this episode. That is keep you room neat! I was afraid something like this would happen again. A messy room only hamper finding of notes which affect studying. It also makes the studying environment more uncomfortable. Tidiness can be a pain but it would be worth it if something like this were to happen again. If I had a less messy room or rather a neat room and I keep things instead of leaving things lying around, procrastinating to keep them, the OBS form would be safely in my file instead of being on top of a shelf. My untidiness is a habit, a bad habit which is so hard to correct. But I have taken baby steps. For instance, I reorganized my file, filed all the previous worksheets they I did not need and put the few which I need in a new identical black file. My personal file is so much thinner now. The next day, I cleared my pile of paper and books on the table. It is exhausting to clear everything in one shot so we need to do regular clearing like every week or if not every day. However, even weekly clearing is troublesome and tiring. I am trying hard to be neat but the prospects of maintaining a clean and tidy room throughout the year does not look good.

Caught in the middle of a cold war

Sigh...the cold war has recently begun.

So what is this cold war.?It is not the period when the United States of America was on bad relations with the Soviet Union or Russia today. This “war” actually is happening in class. This war has no bombshell sound or gun fire but rather it is silent. My friends stopped talking to each other. This chilling silence began around a few days ago...

I know the term "cold war" since I was in primary school because I used to see my parents in that state. My mum ignored my Dad and then the silence. However this war was short and they soon began to talk. I wonder about this one, will the silence last?

Last year, when I was doing project in a group, there were internal problems. Everyone was unhappy and seriously felt like giving a punch into the face of the other. It was because of the project that kept us together. After the judging of the project, we sort of fell out. We did not talk much and we found new friends. This was a miniature form of the cold war. Well, I managed to salvage a friendly relationship with one friend and he still is a friend. It took about 1 year to get the relationship back into a friendly state. The other one I am not so close but we are classmates on fairly-well terms.

I have three friends which I am on great terms with. We do talk and laugh although sometimes at me but we had fun. I am not sure what happened but the three stopped talking to each other. They still talk to me and still are my friends but they treat each other like strangers ignoring each other. Two of them got very irritated by one of them and then "Poof", the silence ensued.

I believe one of my friends got frustrated because that friend, having a playful nature, had irritated him beyond his tolerance level. The other one in my group got so pissed off by my friend's lack of planning of the project that he stopped talking. They both ignored him and because they ignored him, he too ignored them. See this cycle? This vicious cycle of silence?

I was often caught in the middle. Since nobody talked to each other, they talked to me. It is not hard to hear each other criticizing about the other friends’ behaviour. I would sit there and like try to "nod" my head and say "okay...." I often had to pass messages between them since they don't talk to each other and like today when I tried to get a group discussion for the project, one sat at the right end of the class room while the other sat at the opposite side. So I was like a little messenger boy walking left to right and right to left trying to get a date to complete the project. I wonder how my project will fair with this lack of communication. Sheesh...

The previous one is not so problematic. I guess the communications is beginning to build up again since we are tied down by the project. The one between the playful boy and the friend who got irritated is more troublesome. It is sad to see friends act like that when they were on good terms like 3 weeks ago. Now, they are really acting like the USA and the USSR except they don't fight which makes it all the scarier.

My friend asked me a weird question before. He said if I kept helping him but when one day I asked him for help but he refused to help and said "you didn't do anything to help me" or something like that, he asked how I would feel, what will I do and think and why. Well, I treat this question as it meant that what you would do if your friend did something horrible to you. My answer was that I would be angry, walk off and sleep over it. The next day, talk to the person like nothing happened. I would think the person had a bad day so I will not rebut him which would make the situation more complicated nor would fight him as it would only worsen the relationship. I have a policy when making friends. That is to forgive and forget. Though I won't say I can fully abide by it but I do try hard. When one of my friends gave me a huge task to do by the next day, I got very angry since he was like demanding it rather than requesting it and log off Msn to prevent any more conflict. Then, I calmed myself down, did the task till 2am.I try not to bear grudges and gave him the completed task for the project.

I am a guy with few friends and fewer enemies to be honest. I try not to antagonize anyone and try to have a more than average classmate’s relationship with people. I know I need to be kind and patient since I would like others to be kind and patient with me. Seeing others having problems and they have come to ask me to clarify their doubts, I try to welcome and help them. Patience is the key and don't make them feel they are dumb by saying "You still don't get it? Or what is so hard about it?" That is perhaps the worst thing you can say. Help them and they and you will go away happy. Also, do not make witty comments that insult others. That is simply not nice. I try to hold it in sometimes but most of the time I do not come out with insulting comments. Perhaps it is by nature, I am not too sure. Oh and you can join in their activities. Be it computer games or sports, being present and keeping them company also help.

I know all these might seem that I am preaching but this is what I do to maintain a friendly relationship with everyone. I like everyone to be friendly to each other even though that may be impossible due to differences in attitudes, nature and attributes etc. I just hope the cold war would soon end and life would return to normal (friendly state)

Temptation is Everywhere

In my class, temptation is always hanging heavily in the air, always luring us, waiting for us to fall into its trap. Many have fallen prey to it and many still do not admit it. Computer has never been so enticing without it. The rapid clicking and continuous pressing of buttons seem all too alluring. Yes, it has come down to this again. It is the temptation of computer games. Although you may think this topic has been talked about many times, this time will be my fight to ward these temptations off my back.

I was always different from others, at least different in the gaming sense. Many boys had started to play more sophisticated computer games like shooting, soccer and many other fascinating games. You may called me old fashioned but i always though computer games were bad but it affected my grades. My family did not really approve of these games. My sisters never played it, my mum never seemed to approve it so I never really brought it up. Therefore, I did not follow the craze of computer games.

Ever since the school have allowed the use of laptops in the class, the computer gaming in class has been on the rise. First it was one, then it was 3 and then it started to spread like a disease, one which could not be controlled. At first it started off to be passive games, those though addictive but not to the extent to real games with violence and gore. Those are the more violent or expensive games in the market. Even those without violence like football games still share the same negative effects. I do not know how they get the games but now almost half the class had them (free) and they have sped off with the laptop in reach, right hand on the mouse and mind on the game.

It is frightening to see that so many people play these games. Even those who do not play in school have them in their computers and play them at home. Everyone is attracted to one game or another. However, no one can blame them. Why? The computer games are just too tempting for 14 year olds to resist. You can blame it on game creators to make the graphics all too clear, the difficulty of the levels high enough to challenge the minds of the teenagers and the super realistic aspect of the games.

Many have said computer games are bad since some games have violent nature in them which may rub off to the youths. Some games are so addictive that they can play it for hours soon affecting their grades. Some say they affect social skills since they are only facing the computer. I have been looking the positive aspects of computer games and what other people argue against the stereotype of computer games. They said it is a good way to relieve stress from the fast pace society or let out their emotions such as rage in a non violent way. They also involve problem solving, planning, estimation and analysis of the moves or actions of both you and your opponent so it can help in developing problem-solving skills, analytical and estimation skills and quick decision-making. Whichever stand you take, it is all your own opinion.

On Tuesdays, my CCA starts at 4pm.Since school ends at 1.30pm, I have about 2 hours of free time after subtracting lunch time. Sometimes, there is not homework to be done so I walk around in class seeing those who are playing computer games after school. I was impressed by the games. One of the games was on war and soldiers. The player had to accomplish mission objectives, surviving, shooting and such. It was quite violent and I guess it is this thing that makes it appealing. The graphics were awesome and it was realistic. It does show the devastating effects of war on towns and soldiers as many die to complete objectives. Many people in class play football on the computer. You could be a manager in the game, buy and sell players, get sponsorship and money in the game just like in real life. Even if you do not know how to play football which needs real skill, they can play it on the computer with ease. I knew how people could get addicted. The games nowadays are getting more interesting. Time really flies when you are playing especially these games.2 hours have passed so quickly and I went for tennis.

I admit, I enjoy watching people play computer games but playing them yourself is a different matter. You need to have self-control. I always wonder what my classmates do when they are at home. So I went to ask them. They replied that after they finish their homework, they play their computer, to no surprise. Some finish they work in school so they can play at home. I remembered one stayed up to 12am playing these games.

No wonder excessive gaming is bad for grades. However, most of my classmates are responsible enough to complete their work first, or at least I think so.

Everyone is playing these games so there is a temptation of me playing too. That was how the computer game craze came about. One person got one game and soon others were playing them as well. This is peer pressure and if you do not follow the trend, you would be left out in a sense. This devil called temptation has been trapping many teenagers under its spell, ruining their grades and conduct in school. I may not be my school but I am sure there are others suffering the effects of addiction. There is always an urge to get and play these games and the feeling has been increasing in intensity since at the start of this year. I know addiction is bad so I have denied myself from playing. Some have said I should play since everyone is doing it or it would relieve stress since I am usually uptight. However, I know what addiction can do to me if I lack self-control. Therefore, I do not even try to get the game as temptation will sooner or later lure me into playing. I just hope it will remain that way.

I do play some games at my friends' house and we do have fun. I guess it is to occasionally release stress. However as students we need to get our priorities straight. I think our studies still comes before having fun. There is a thin line between fun and addiction. Gaming can be an enjoyable and relaxing experience. We just need our self-control and willpower before it turns into gaming addiction.

If you think you lack self-control, do not try it.